The Garfield Movie is a 2024 computer-animated adventure comedy film based on Jim Davis' comic strip of the same name and released by Columbia Pictures. In this film, Garfield has an unexpected reunion with his long-lost father, a scruffy street cat who draws him into a high-stakes heist. It was the last Garfield film distributed by the non-Paramount company, due to the fact that the Garfield franchise was acquired by Paramount Global in 2019.
- Directed by Mark Dindal. Written by Paul A. Kaplan, Mark Torgove and David Reynolds.
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Garfield
[edit]
- And that's how I adopted Jon.
- [Jon: Say when.] Never, Jon! Bury me in cheese!
- Oh, I apologize in advance. The eating you're about to see will not be pretty. And if you have young children, this would be a good time for them to leave the room.
- You saw nothing.
- [Liz Wilson: We're gonna need the big scale!] Does she need to announce it to the whole office?
- Odie, I'm dreaming again. Slap me across the face.
- I think this is a case of mistaken identity. You must be looking for another gorgeous lovable kitty cat.
- This is Vic, my "father".
- I haven't seen you for years, and when I do, you pull me into a life of crime!
- Oh, cheddar, probably one of my top 26 favorite cheeses.
- Hey, I know tough, Vic. You obviously never been in an Olive Garden that's run out of breadsticks.
- If I don't make it back, tell my story.
- No. I bought takeout.
- Definitely a Monday.
- And that's why we should go from Sunday to Tuesday.
Vic
[edit]
- Wait here, Junior. I'll be right back.
- Hey, Junior.
- If you have never jumped on a train, just say it.
- Odie, you think he'd see that coming.
- We need to toughen you up.
Jinx
[edit]
- Welcome back, Victor!
- Would you prefer a meowmosa.
- My purpose was revenge!
- We didn't have much but we had each other.
Jon Arbuckle
[edit]
- [from trailer] I'm gonna name you Garfield.
- I WILL NOT HOLD! I AM DONE HOLDING! THE JON WHO WAS ON HOLD IS DEAD! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!
Dialogue
[edit]
- [The scene starts off on a phone screen, showing an image of Garfield, a frowning orange tabby cat, and his owner, Jon Arbuckle, wearing sweaters with their faces on them]
- Garfield: [first lines; offscreen] OK, it's time to eat. [types in the password 061978 on the phone, unlocking it] Let's see, open the app. [opens the Mamma Leoni’s app to make his order] I’m gonna get a double pepperoni pizza, uh, an order of breadsticks, and...Well, lasagna. Yeah. Ooh! A new item alert? Jalapeño breadstick quick bites. Huh. It might be nice to add something in the salad family. And do I want dessert? Oooh! [chuckles] I’m gonna be naughty! Butterscotch budino. OK, I’m gonna have five. [The app screen slides to the side to show the orange tabby cat himself] Delivery? Goes without saying...[hits NOW] now, please.
- Mamma Leoni's App: Mama mia!
- Garfield: Alright. That oughta hold me 'til breakfast. [notices the audience] Oh, hey! Are you guys early or am I late? No matter. I have got a real treat for you today. [Odie, a yellow dog with brown ears, jumps and barks excitedly] No, not a treat for you. [Odie whines sadly; sighs] OK. [He gives Odie a biscuit and he eats it before licking him happily, much to his disgust] Anyway, about that treat...[pushes Odie down] Can I just say, you will not be disappointed. [laughs] It’s a story about me...[the doorbell rings]...that no one’s ever heard before featuring someone in my life you’ve never met. I don’t know about you, but color me intrigued. [A drone enters the house, delivering Garfield’s order] Oh ho yeah! Drone delivery. Welcome to the future. [opens the box for his double pepperoni pizza] You know, to really understand everything, I’m gonna have to take you back to where it all began. [notices a small basil on his pizza] Don’t want anything to take away from the flavor of cheese. [flicks it off, stretches his mouth open, places the pizza in, and munches down] And like every great story, it all started... [He moves his mouth in a sucking position near his drink. Odie tips the cup to Garfield’s mouth and the cat sips his drink] ...on a dark and stormy night.
- [Odie holds up a cardboard thunderstorm cloud and mimics thunder and lightning. Cut to black. In a flashback, a silhouetted cat looks over at something]
- Silhouetted cat: Wait here, Junior. I'll be right back.
- [Garfield, as a kitten, looks up at the silhouetted cat, who walks away, then hides. Garfield, sitting in a crate, reaches out with his little paws as if motioning for the cat to not leave him. Moments later, rain pours. Garfield looks over the side, seeing that the cat isn't coming back. He jumps back in fear as he hears various noises, then covers his face protectively. Suddenly, he sniffs the air, then spots an Italian restaurant called Mamma Leoni’s across the street. Garfield watches as Vito, through the window, holding two steaming pizzas on trays. Jon sits alone on a table. Garfield glances over the path where the cat went, then runs out of the crate. He crosses the street towards the restaurant as three cars pass by, narrowly missing him. Reaching the window, Garfield sniffs the air again. Inside, Jon sits at his table as Vito serves him pepperoni pizza. Grabbing a slice, he sees one family playing Heads Up on their phone]
- Girl: Open wide, Jake.
- [A girl feeds her brother, Jake, a meatball. Jon smiles, then frowns and sighs sadly. He sets his head on his hand. He opens his mouth to take a bite of the slice, then gets startled when a splat is heard. Garfield, with his face pressed against the window, stares at the pizza, then pulls it back as Jon stares at him]
- Jon: Aww! [leans in, then holds out a finger] Hi there, little buddy! Hi! [Garfield paws at his finger, then looks over at the pizza and licks the glass. Jon glances over to see no one coming, then secretly opens the window to let Garfield in. Garfield, despite his tiny pint size, hops into his hand. As the duo stare at each other, Garfield licks his cheek as Jon chuckles, then rubs his back on his chin while purring. Jon sets his little friend on the table beside the pizza] Are you hungry, little guy? [As Garfield nods as if saying "Yes", Jon feeds him a pepperoni, then chuckles and offers another] Do you want a little more? [At lightning speed, Garfield eats the entire pizza, then the slice that Jon was about to eat, then finally eats the pepperoni] Whoa! You are a hungry little guy. [sees Vito coming, then grabs a menu, hiding Garfield behind it]
- Vito: That was a quick dinner, Signore Jon. You must’ve been very hungry. [chuckles as Garfield peeks out from under Jon's wrist, but Jon himself pushes him back behind the menu] Can I bring you anything else?
- Jon: Uh, yes. [looks at the menu as Garfield rubs his paw on a picture of a single piece of lasagna]
- Musician: [offscreen] Grazie! Grazie! Thank you very much!
- Jon: Some...lasagna?
- Vito: Si. Lasagna for one.
- Jon: Uh, yeah. [looks at the menu again as Garfield points to a picture of a 6-piece family-styled lasagna] You know what? No. Uh, make it family-style.
- Vito: Very good.
- Jon: [as Vito walks away] To go, please, Vito.
- Musician: [offscreen] OK! Everybody! You all know this one!
- Jon: [lifts the menu to find Garfield gone] Huh? What? Where'd he go? [spots Garfield slurping spaghetti and meatballs as a birthday party commences]
- Patrons: [offscreen] Hey!
- Musician: [offscreen] Stand up and sing. Join us.
- Jon: Oh, no! ["Tarantella Napoletana" plays as he moves through the crowd] Oh, no. Excuse me. Pardon me. [moves under another table, and tries to grab Garfield, but finds marinara sauce on his fingers. He notices Garfield eating cookies. As he goes to eat a slice of pizza, Jon grabs him, still on the plate, and hides him behind his back as Vito walks by with a big birthday cake. Once Vito is gone, Jon pulls out the plate from behind his back, but once again, Garfield has disappeared. He spots him walking through the birthday cake with a big bite on it. Jon scrambles on all fours to search for him]
- Maria: [offscreen] Jon! Take-out for Jon! [As Jon looks around, Maria comes in with a to-go box for Jon] Your take-out is ready, Signore Jon.
- Jon: Yes.
- Maria: One familia-style lasagna to go! [opens the box, revealing Garfield eating on the top middle of the family-style lasagna] You eat alone too much, Jon.
- Jon: Yeah.
- Maria: You should get on the dating apps.
- Jon: No, I'm good, thanks.
- Maria: There's Bumble, Tinder, Gluten-Free Singles...
- Jon: Oh, really?
- Maria: Hot Sauce Passions.
- Jon: No, I could never.
- Maria: And you should spend serious money on premium memberships.
- Jon: Bye! [quickly leaves the restaurant, and the lid pops open, with Garfield still in the box] Huh? Oh, hey. [chuckles as he sets the box down on the ground, and puts Garfield on the lid] Well, that was an interesting dinner… that you had. Well, I guess, um...this is where we say goodbye. [Garfield cocks his head] Oh, you’re really cute, but I can’t have pets in my apartment. So...I’ll see you around, OK? Go on. [As Garfield sniffles sadly, he cries, shedding a lot of tears] Oh, no. No, no, no, don’t cry. Don’t cry. [The tears make a river that leads to a storm drain. Garfield waves goodbye to him] Oh. Oh! No, no, no, no, no! No! Oh, no! Oh, no! [scrambles toward Garfield, and grabs him, just as the box enters the storm drain. He then stands up while holding the tiny pint-sized kitten in both hands] You don’t have a home, do you?
- [Garfield looks away sadly as if to say, "No", then he stares at Jon, blinking his big brown eyes. Jon smiles, and so does Garfield, who kisses him on the nose. Jon smiles as he nuzzles his little friend. Garfield pulls the screen up, bringing us back to the present while eating some breadsticks]
- Garfield: And that's how I adopted Jon.
- [Odie facepalms and brings down the screen to show the title card of the film. We then cut to a little house in the suburbs]
- Garfield: [voiceover] So I moved Jon out of his apartment to this nice, little two-bed, two-bath in the suburbs. [We see a time passage of Jon putting down pet stuff while Garfield eats pizza, voiceover] As soon as he understood the ground rules, well, let’s just say, we were living the dream. [Cut to Garfield riding through the wind, voiceover] And once we were settled in, I even let Jon get a pet. [Zoom out to see him riding on top of Odie, as a puppy. They run around the house while Jon reads “The Great Catsby.” Then, they ride atop a robotic vacuum with Garfield drinking from a cup and Odie gnawing on a bone. Cut to Baby Garfield pulling down the table covers to bring down two glass cookie jars. Garfield ends up inside one while Odie’s head is in another, voiceover] Odie, became my most trusted ally. He was kind, gentle, and most importantly, my unpaid intern. [Odie bounces on Garfield’s tummy and steals a burger from Jon. Garfield removes the lettuce, and eats the burger before giving the lettuce to Odie, who looks at the viewers as if saying, "Seriously?". Later, as Jon is drawing, Garfield is bungee jumping outside the house. Each time Jon checks, he sees nothing. Then, as Garfield blows raspberries at his owner, we see the bungee rope being Odie’s tongue. Cut to see Odie eating from Garfield’s food bowl. Then, time passes and the two grow up while eating and watching TV with Jon. Garfield is holding his beloved teddy bear, Pooky. Voiceover] Oh, yeah. As you can see, life here is pretty near perfect. [Cut close to him, clears his throat and looks at the audience] Well, yeah, except for...
- [The word “MONDAYS” in giant red capital letters suddenly slams down in front of a white background. Jon opens the curtains]
- Jon: Time to go to the vet!
- [Cut to a vet appointment, Garfield is set on a scale while Jon looks lovingly at Liz. The scale breaks beneath the cat and Liz gets out an intercom]
- Liz Wilson: [over PA] We’re gonna need the big scale!
- Garfield: [to the viewers] Does she need to announce it to the whole office?
- [The montage of Garfield causing bad luck every Monday plays. Garfield hanging on a tree branch before a strong wind blows him off, into the house, and out through a window. Garfield getting scared by a spider, a pie thrown at Garfield’s face, Odie licking him, his ice cream dropping to the ground when he licks it, and his toothpaste squirting too much. Then, Jon puts on his protective gear to give Garfield a bath]
- Garfield: [as he's being bathed] No! Please! No! Ow, it’s so hot! Ow, it’s really hurting! Ow, ow, ow!
- [Soon, Jon dries him up and he’s all poofy. Odie drops his ball in shock and Garfield angrily glares at him. Garfield growls in anger. The montage ends, where Garfield grumpily shredding the "MONDAYS" paper in a paper shredder]
- Garfield: [to the viewers; grumpily] And that’s why we should go from Sunday to Tuesday. [pause] OK. Where were we?
- [On the next day, Garfield walks up to Jon, who sleeps in bed]
- Garfield: Wakie, wakie, eggs and bakey! [lies down on Jon’s face] Good morning!
- [In the kitchen, Jon puts some vegetables in a blender. As Odie barks for Jon to pet him each time, Garfield secretly puts in some bacon, a T-bone steak, three pizza slices, two pies, and a piece of cake in the blender. Jon closes the lid, and starts blending. Garfield walks on the ceiling, and opens his mouth. The blender shakes and smoothie bursts out, shocking Jon and Odie. Garfield lands down on the counter, having eaten the smoothie. Cut to Jon reading Romeo and Mew-liet until Odie pushes in Garfield with a fancy chair]
- Jon: What? Where’d you get that chair?
- [Garfield presses a red button on the arm and the chair becomes a recliner with stereo systems. Odie brings in a tray of food and a TV. The TV set shows Catflix, a streaming service that shows cat videos. One shows a cat playing the piano. Jon is in confusion while Garfield eats some popcorn. Suddenly, the channel switches to a romantic comedy film]
- Rom-Com Woman: [on TV] I think I was meant to be here tonight because I was meant to meet you.
- Rom-Com Man: [on TV] I think we were meant to be.
- Rom-Com Woman: [on TV] That’s what I meant to say.
- Rom-Com Man: [on TV] You had me at the word “meant.” [they both kiss]
- [Garfield sees that Odie has the remote. Jon and Odie cry some tears of joy at the scene while Garfield is not amused. Cut to Jon riding a fitness bike]
- Fitness Bike Instructor: [on phone] We're going to ride like the wind! Faster! Harder! More exciting!
- [Jon pedals faster and faster until he slumps over, exhausted. Garfield comes in and puts a slice of pepperoni pizza in Jon’s mouth]
- Garfield: Odie! Yeah, can you put this back to normal? [to Jon] There you go. Just let the pepperoni’s healing powers work its magic.
- [Odie hangs some shirts on the fitness bike. Then, Jon is asleep by his drawing board. Garfield points at this then rolls Jon over to bed. He positions him right, puts a blanket over him, adds an eye mask and Sony headphones, and gives him Pooky. As Garfield leaves, he sees Odie having watched him rest his owner]
- Garfield: You saw nothing. [jumps off the bed as Odie sleeps with Jon, he turns off the light]
- Garfield: [voiceover] Up until that moment, my life was a perfect souffle. Little did I know, it was all about to collapse.
- [Cut to the three sleeping in bed. The sleeping Jon is listening to a sleep app through the headphones]
- Sleep App Voice: Imagine yourself drifting away on a sea of tranquility. There are no pets to bother you, distract you, or max out your credit card by excessively placing online food orders.
- Garfield: [As he sleeps, his stomach growls and yawns] Oh, yeah, sorry. [his stomach growls again, waking him up] Huh? What? Who said that? Huh? Odie. Odie. Odie! [Odie wakes up] It’s time for our midnight snack. [Odie jumps off from Jon's bed. He moans as Odie helps him up from his bed. Yawns] Thank you, good sir. Your kindness will be rewarded.
- [As they head to the kitchen, Barry, a little blue bird, spies on them from the window. Garfield and Odie open the fridge]
- Garfield: [yawns] What are we feeling like today, huh? French? Italian? Chinese? Cupcakes? [his stomach growls] Chinese it is. Odie, shape everything from the bottom two shelves into a dumpling. [As Odie grabs some food, they hear shuffling nearby]
- Garfield and Odie: Huh?
- [They turn to see the pet door flapping. Then, they see an open window while rain pours outside. They become nervous until a huge shadow looms over them. They look up to see Roland, a huge dog, looming over them with Nolan, a small skinny dog, on his back. Garfield lifts up Roland's face folds to show the dog's angry eyes]
- Roland: [in British accent] Late night snacking?
- Nolan: Not good for digestion.
- Garfield: [uninterested] Odie, I'm dreaming again. Slap me across the face. [Odie slaps Garfield and Roland roars at the him] Nope! Still dreaming. I must be really deep in this one.
- [The two get stuffed in bags]
- [While the dogs, along with the spy bird, head to an abandoned mall]
- Garfield: [in the bag] What do you guys...What do you want? Money? I don't have any money, okay? Who-who carries cash anymore? I've-- I-I've got Jon's credit card number memorized. 5552-3857-5521. Did you write that down? Expiration code is 555.
- [Inside the mall, they release the two from the bags]
- Nolan: The cat is out of the bag! [Cackles. He throws the rope up]
- Roland: We hope this kidnapping plan works or she’ll put us down....with her insults and cutting observations.
- [They tie the two by their ankles and pull up the ropes]
- Garfield: I think this is a case of mistaken identity! You must be looking for another gorgeous, lovable kitty cat! Right?! [Once they’re high above, the two dogs leave] Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, where you going? No, no, come back, come back! [Odie barking] No, no. Odie?
- Odie: Hmm?
- Garfield: I'll handle this. Alright, you guys, I'm giving you the count of 3 to get back here, and let us down! 1, 2, 3! Four, five… I am not kidding here! [Later, Garfield is exhausted while Odie plays the harmonica] 308, 309...I can't... yeah, they’re not coming. [groans] It’s over.
- Voice: [offscreen] Psst!
- Garfield: [He and Odie turn around to see a shrouded figure standing in the mall] Huh? [Odie drops his harmonica in awe] Am I dead? [The shrouded figure moves around] Are you an angel? [It comes to the mall ceiling by the ropes] Please take me. I am ready to go to...[sobs] to the all-you-can-eat buffet in the sky.
- Shrouded figure: What? Listen, I’m going to swing you out, cut your ropes, and drop you safely to that landing below.
- Garfield: Wait, what? That seems a tad risky. Is there another plan that doesn’t involve cutting the rope from a 40-foot drop?
- Shrouded figure: No time. We gotta get outta here before they come back. [He swings Odie first then cuts his rope. The dog lands perfectly on the landing. Then, the shrouded figure swings Garfield and cuts his rope. The cat falls and lands next to Odie, though not so gracefully] We need to go! Come on, Junior!
- [Garfield gasps in shock as he remembers being left in the alley]
- Silhouetted cat: [flashback] Wait here, Junior. I’ll be right back. [echoes]
- Garfield: [narrows his eyes as he pulls the shroud off the figure, revealing Vic, a burly orange tabby cat, then gasps and points angrily at him] You!
- Vic: Uh… Hey, Junior.
- Odie: Huh?
- Garfield: Who is he? This is Vic, my "father".
- Vic: Look, Junior, I know how you might be upset…
- Garfield: [ticked off] Upset?! Why would I be upset? You only abandoned me in an alley as a kitten! I’m probably just overreacting!
- [Suddenly, they hear a claw scratching against metal]
- Vic: Oh, no. Not her. Quick, follow me, junior!
- Garfield: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You lost the privilege of telling me what to do a long time ago.
- [Red light glows behind them, revealing a maniacal cat named Jinx with a glowing mood necklace]
- Jinx: Hello, Vic!
- [The three jump back and scream, startled]
- Vic: [scared] Dang!
- Jinx: Scare-cam! [laughs] Oh, you should’ve seen your faces! [makes spooky noises then laughs as she runs over to Nolan and Roland holding a phone] OK, boys, show me! [The phone shows a video of the trio being scared by her sudden appearance, laughs] Post that ASAP! [laughs]
- Vic: Hey, Jinx. I haven’t seen you since… Oh, well, no hard feelings though, right? [holds his hand out for a handshake]
- Jinx: [pushes Vic's hand away] Oh, I don’t think so. [glares for a moment, then smiles] I’m a hugger! [hugs Vic]
- Garfield: A part of me wants to be mad at her for kidnapping us, but you gotta love her energy.
- Jinx: [gasps] Where are my manners? [claps her paws to summon Barry]
- Barry: Chop, chop, gentlemen. Look alive.
- [Nolan sets up the table and Roland pours them glasses of milk]
- Jinx: [drinks hers] Perfection. You know, I was so delighted to think you accepted my invitation here tonight.
- Garfield: Well, throwing us in a burlap sack wasn’t exactly an Evite.
- Jinx: Vic, you’re so quiet. Are you feline sad? Cat got your tongue? Would you prefer a mew-mosa?
- Garfield: Excuse me, how do you two know each other?
- Vic: Let me handle this, Junior.
- Garfield: Oh, don’t "Junior" me. You may call me Garfield, Mr. Garfield, or G-Money. [Odie scoffs] Okay, whatever, no G-Money. Anyway, can somebody please tell me what is going on!?
- Vic: Uh, we really...
- Jinx: [interrupts Vic] I’ll take this one.
- [Roland is nearby, playing the piano]
- Garfield: What?
- [Odie shrugs “I don’t know”]
- Jinx: I’m from a small town outside London that you’ve probably never heard of. Oh, I scratched and clawed my way through hard times to come here with one dream. [We fade to a flashback of her entering America’s Next Top Feline, walking down the red carpet as people take pictures of her, voiceover] I wanted to be seen. I wanted to matter. [Cut to her holding a tuba. She stands still in stage fright. Crickets chirp. Voiceover] But... [wah-wah sound is heard] I was a failure.
- Announcer: [offscreen; spotlight shines elsewhere] The winner!
- [Fade to her sitting on a bench. A hand holds out to her, and she sees Vic and his cat crew]
- Jinx: [voiceover] And then, I met Vic and his crew. They were outcasts. Losers. Thugs. We didn’t have much, but we had each other. We became a real family.
- [Cut back to present day]
- Garfield: [scoffs] Vic and family. I know where this is going. [to Roland] Excuse me, garcon? Uh, when might we expect appetizers? Perhaps some amuse-bouche?
- Jinx: Then, one night...[Cut to a flashback of the crew stealing quarts of milk from Lactose Farms. Voiceover] We were about to make our biggest score. Enough milk to last us for weeks! [She drops one bottle and tries to get it, only to be captured and thrown in a pound truck, flashback] Vic! VIIIIIIC!!! [Vic tries to go after the truck, but it drives off with her. Cut back to present day]
- Vic: Jinx, I tried to come back for you. You have to know that.
- Jinx: Oh, yes. You get an A for effort.
- Garfield: So, what happened next?
- Jinx: Imagine Alcatraz...[Cut to her being served slop in the pound. Voiceover] But smellier. It was cold and lonely...[One cat knocks her lunch away. Cut to Jinx sleeping under a smelly cat, voiceover] And stinky. So very stinky. I can’t ever state that enough. [Cut to her sulking at the fence. Voiceover] But it gave me purpose. I needed to get out. I just needed help.
- [A ball rolls over to her. She turns to see Roland and Nolan. Jinx throws the ball to Roland, who grabs it with his mouth. Smiling, she gets an idea. Later, the three of them break out of the pound. Cut back to present day]
- Garfield: So, your purpose was to escape jail and get involved with charities?
- Jinx: Nope. My purpose was...revenge. [Vic gulps in fear]
- Garfield: Oh, I see. I went the other way with it.
- Jinx: I’m kidding! Another cat would be bent on revenge, but I’m a...ooh, how do you put it?
- Barry: Evolved, compassionate, and incredibly self-actualized.
- Jinx: Bingo! [giggles] I had such trouble finding him and when I discovered you were his son, I had no choice but to kidnap you to lure him here.
- Garfield: Listen, I totally get it. It’s all a part of being associated with Vic. So, what do you need from him to make this right?
- Jinx: I simply want him to pay back the quart of milk I lost that night, and we’ll call it even.
- Vic: I can do that.
- Garfield: What he can’t do is raise a child.
- Jinx: Just one quart.
- Garfield: Just one quart.
- Vic: Done!
- Garfield: Done!
- Jinx: For every day I was in the pound.
- Vic: What now?
- Garfield: Nice twist. Well played.
- Vic: Uh, how long were you in the pound again?
- Jinx: 4 years, 7 months, and 2 days.
- Vic: Whoa! That long?
- Garfield: Alright, I’m gonna do the math here in my brain and, uh...the way you do that is...[clears his throat] Odie?
- [Odie barks to Garfield the grand total]
- Garfield: 1,675 quarts of milk. Exactly right, Odie. We both came up with it at the exact same time.
- Vic: Where am I gonna find that much milk?
- Jinx: Well, I suggest you go back to the place you double-crossed me. Lactose Farms.
- Garfield: Wow. Well, good luck, Vic. [laughs] I’ll leave you two to work on the fine print. We’ll just see ourselves out. Odie...[He tries to leave but is stopped by Roland and Nolan]
- Jinx: Uh, no, you’re all going to do this.
- Garfield: What? Why me? He’s the one who abandoned you!
- Jinx: Yes, but this is more than a one-cat job.
- Garfield: If I’m sure Vic has a whole crew of lowlife cat burglars, he could ask.
- Jinx: Oh, I’m sure he does, but if I’m being completely honest, seeing how miserable you make one another brings me endless satisfaction.
- Garfield: Oh, well, thank you for your honesty. And if I don’t go?
- Jinx: You can stay and have a playdate with Roland and Nolan. [to the hench-dogs] Okay, boys, go play!
- [The two dogs proceed to maul two nearby mannequins]
- Barry: [clears his throat, last lines] Ma’am. I think this is an opportunity to take a deep, cleansing breath and repeat your anger management mantra.
- [Suddenly, Jinx eats Barry and spits out a feather. The three are terrified by this]
- Jinx: [clears her throat] Anyone else have any objections?
- Garfield: [gulps nervously] Nope, I’m good. [gives two thumbs-up] Thanks for the opportunity.
- Jinx: Excellent! Now you boys have 72 hours...[drinks her milk and throws her glass away] or else!
- [Garfield, Vic, and Odie walk outside the abandoned mall]
- Garfield: I can't believe this is happening! I don't see you for years! And when I do, you're pulling me into a life of crime.
- Vic: I had this reunion playing differently in my head, too.
- Garfield: That's the difference between us, because I never wanted to see you again!
- Vic: I totally understand your anger, but give me a chance to explain. You'll see, I'm not the bad guy you think I am.
- Garfield: A good guy doesn't leave his kid in an alley!
- Vic: It wasn't like that.
- Garfield: [angry] IT WAS EXACTLY LIKE THAT!
- Vic: No, it wasn't. Let me tell you.
- Garfield: No, no, I don't want to hear it! This whole thing with Jinx, this is your mess, not mine! Come on, Odie. [Unfortunately, he is stopped by Roland and Nolan]
- Roland: Can’t let you do that.
- Nolan: We’ll be watching you.
- Roland: Like a hawk.
- [They hide behind a stop sign with Nolan giving Garfield a “We’re watching you” look]
- Garfield: [groans in frustration] Is today a Monday!? ‘Cause it feels an awful lot like a Monday.
- Vic: It’s Thursday.
- Garfield: Not to me, it’s not!
- Vic: Look, I know this isn't ideal, but we have to do this. [as Garfield growls] So, let's just try and make the best of our time together.
- Garfield: Our time together?! What are you talking about?! Once we get this milk, I want you out of my life! Forever!
- Vic: Alright, just relax. Lactose Farms is nothing but a sleepy little mom-and-pop dairy. This will be a quick grab-and-go. You’ll be back home before you know it. [laughs]
- Garfield: [sighs] How do we even get to Lactose Farms? It’s way out in the country.
- Vic: You ever jumped a train?
- Garfield: I’ve never jumped.
- Vic: Well, if jumping the train is too hard, just say it.
- Garfield: How hard could it be?
- Vic: Exactly! [laughs as he slaps Garfield to the ground] This is gonna be fun! [flexes his arms]
- [The next morning at the house, Jon walks down the stairs]
- Jon: [yawns] Garfield? Odie? Hello? [notices the refrigerator door left open] Garfield, how many times have I told you to close the refrigerator door? [spots some food still on the floor when Garfield and Odie were kidnapped by Roland and Nolan] Wait. There’s food on the floor. [gasps] He's never left food on the floor. Garfield? [checks the halls] Garfield? [checks the closet] Garfield? [checks under the couch] Garfield? [checks out the pet door] Garfield? [checks from the chimney] Garfield? [steps out the door] GARFIELD!!!!
- [Back with Garfield, Vic and Odie as they slide down a hill and stop by the railroad tracks]
- Vic: Our best shot at jumping on a train is here.
- Garfield: Hold on a sec. I’m just taking in the wind speed, the direction of the sun, and various angles. Yes, I say we jump the train from right here.
- Vic: Didn’t I just say that?
- Garfield: I’ve seen enough television a million times. We’ll need a hundred feet of rope...
- Vic: Uh-huh. Rope. Yeah, okay. [He sets Garfield on a branch and pulls it back]
- Garfield: We’ll throw the rope over that branch right there.
- Vic: Branch. Uh-huh. Got it.
- Garfield: Can you follow me? Alright. [as the train approaches] And then, timing it just right, we swing over as the train passes by and land on top of the car. Boom!
- Vic: Or we can do this. [He lets go of the branch, launching Garfield through an open train car] Odie! Jump, boy!
- [As the two jump on, Garfield is sprung off a tree, launching him into another. The two trees bounce him back and forth while Nolan and Roland watch from a distance]
- Nolan: Part of me wants to help him.
- Roland: No. This is how he learns.
- [Then, Garfield bounces off the awning of a trailer, gets kicked off by a billy goat, and splats on a car window. He grins maniacally before the unfazed driver wipes him off the window. Cut to a catapult sale going on. A customer speaks to the salesman about a catapult]
- Used Catapult Customer: I don’t know. It’s kind of pricey. How much does it handle? [Garfield lands on the catapult and it launches him away; impressed] Whoa! I’ll take it!
- [Garfield bounces off a parade float of himself, rolls downhill, falls off a cliff, lands and bounces off a power line, and finally lands in a pile of manure inside the train car Vic and Odie are on]
- Vic: See? I told you this was gonna be fun!
- Garfield: [in the manure] You and I have different definitions of “fun.”
- [Cut back to Jon’s house, he speaks to someone on the phone]
- Automated Voice: [on phone] Hello?
- Jon: [on phone] Oh, finally! Hello!
- Automated Voice: [on phone] You’ve reached Find My Pet. If your pet is lost, we're here to help.
- Jon: [on phone] Hi! Yes! Great! OK. Uh, my orange tabby and my dog are both missing, and I need your help.
- Automated Voice: [on phone] Please listen carefully, as our menu options have changed.
- Jon: [on phone] OK.
- Automated Voice: [on phone] If you'd like to hear this call in Spanish...[speaking Spanish]
- Jon: [on phone] What?
- Automated Voice: [on phone] For Pig Latin, ess-pray even-say.
- Jon: [on phone] Come on.
- Automated Voice: [on phone] For gibberish...[speaks gibberish]
- Jon: [on phone] What do I press to talk to a real person?!
- Automated Voice: [on phone] Your call is very important. There are [in deep voice] 1,046 [in normal voice] people ahead of you.
- Jon: What?! Garfield, where are you?!
- [Back on the train, Vic tries to think up a plan]
- Vic: [to himself] Okay, Vic, you gotta figure this out. [sighs] Jinx can’t be trusted and you gotta keep Junior safe. Just gotta figure out a way to get him out of this. [He finds Odie pulling twigs and spiked nuts off Garfield’s body]
- Garfield: Tell me. Is it a bird? It really hurts. OW! You pulled my hair! Is it a bug? A bug? OWWW, OWIE, OWIE, OWIE, STOP IT, ODIE! AAHH! Okay.
- Vic: [He facepalms but then sees Garfield’s collar and tag. He gets an idea] You know what, Junior? This is gonna be good for you.
- Garfield: [pulls a spike nut off his fur] What’ll be good for me?
- Vic: What are we doing?
- Garfield: We’re about to steal a truck full of milk from a dairy to pay back a deranged...[pulls off another] cat. What part of that is going to be good for me?
- Vic: All of it! You can’t even imagine the life lessons you’re gonna learn.
- Garfield: Oh, yeah? Name one.
- Vic: Well, for starters, you already know how to get on a movin' train. [Laughs, Garfield is not amused. Clears throat] I found it funny. All I'm sayin', is that to break into a dairy, it's gonna take a few skills, I'm guessing a rounded, mush-filled, overly pampered indoor cat like you, [Garfield pokes his tummy] doesn't have. So, we need to toughen you up.
- Garfield: Toughen me up? Hey, I know tough, Vic. You obviously have never been in an Olive Garden that’s run out of breadsticks. Anyway, I’m never gonna need those skills you’re talking about.
- Vic: But you’ll have to.
- Garfield: I'm never gonna break into a dairy, or anything else. Ever again.
- Vic: You are missing the point! You're going to learn to improvise. Think on your feet, develop moves that'll come in handy in the real world.
- Garfield: I wouldn’t be in the real world if it wasn’t for you!
- Vic: True. You’d still be hanging upside down in the mall.
- Garfield: You know, I would be asleep at home!
- Vic: Missing out on life all together! Look, I’m just a dad trying to teach his son skills.
- Garfield: Oh, no, no, no, no. You can't make up for five years of not being around.
- Vic: Uh, yes, I can.
- Garfield: No, you can’t.
- Vic: I think I can.
- Garfield: In fact, you can’t.
- Vic: Yes, I can!
- Garfield: You really can’t!
- Vic: With your attitude, I can!
- Garfield: [screams in anger] Okay, whatever, “dad!” [sarcastic] Wow, great lesson! [groans in upset] I’m done talking to you, you don’t know me, and you don’t know the first thing about me. I am not pampered. I am not anything you think I am.
- [After their talk, Odie has made the train car into a paradise for Garfield. He lays on a hammock]
- Vic: Okay. Just gonna say that blanket is not the best idea.
- Garfield: Ah, fantastic. Thank you. I’ll take it from here. [He puts the blanket over himself, only to be covered in spiders. screams] Get them off! Get them off! Get them off me! [Vic picks up him and lifts a bag of cedar chips over him] What are you doing? [Then, he opens it, dumping the chips on the spiders. Garfield pops out of the pile, stunned] What’d you do?
- Vic: Cedar chips. Spiders hate them. See? Another life skill learned.
- Garfield: [stunned] I-I-I...
- Vic: I think the words you’re looking for are “Thank you, pops.”
- Garfield: No, the word I’m looking for is...
- Vic: Oh! Here’s our stop!
- Garfield: Really? Where? [Vic kicks him out]
- Vic: [laughs] Oh, Odie, you think he’d see that coming. [He and Odie jump off the train]
- [Not knowing Roland and Nolan are following closely behind]
- [A balloon transition shows Lactose Farms as part-amusement park and part-factory. A steel gate shuts in front of the camera]
- Garfield: Quaint. Just a simple little grab-and-go.
- Vic: Okay, okay, so they’ve done a few upgrades since I was last here. Stop being so dramatic. All we have to do is climb the fence.
- [A yellow bird perches on the fence and it electrocutes the bird, sending him flying and landing on the ground. Still alive but hurt. Garfield walks over to a tree and bangs his head against it two times. The shocked bird stumbles around, muttering. Garfield bangs his head once more. Then, he spots a purple bull named Otto sitting on a rock looking forlorn. He recognizes Otto and gasps]
- Garfield: Wait. Is that Otto?
- Vic: Who?
- Garfield: Otto! Of Otto and Ethel?
- Vic: Uh, no clue what you’re talking about.
- Garfield: He’s one of the mascots of Lactose Farms. See? On the side of the barn? [He points to a painting of Otto and Ethel on the barn] I’ll bet he knows how to get into that place.
- Vic: Leave him alone. Seems to be in a period of meditation. Or depression.
- Garfield: Yes, he does. Mmm. This calls for cat sensitivity and diplomacy.
- Vic: Oh, yeah? And where are we supposed to get that?
- Garfield: I have it in spades. Watch. Maybe you’ll learn something. [He approaches Otto] Excuse me. You’re Otto, right? [Otto grunts in response. clear throat] I’m Garfield. A pleasure.
- Otto: Go away.
- Garfield: Just wanted to say I am a huge fan. I have eaten everything that has a picture of your face on it.
- Otto: I’m not that guy anymore.
- Garfield: I even loved that recalled provolone from a few years back.
- Vic: Junior, no!
- Garfield: Yeah. Anyways, here’s the thing. Me and my crew back there, we’re in a bit of a bind. Got ourselves in a situation. A long story short, we could use your help.
- Otto: [grunts] You’re a fan, huh?
- Garfield: Ha ha. Oh yes. Big time.
- Otto: Then sing the jingle.
- Garfield: Well, I don’t really sing on command. I’m not a circus animal.
- Otto: Sing it.
- Garfield: Really? [chuckles]
- Otto: Sing it!
- Garfield: [clears his throat and sings] ♪ Lactose Farms. Lactose Farms. We’ve got milk, butters, creams, and cheeses. ♪
- Otto: More spirit!
- Garfield: [sings with more spirit] ♪ As much as you want, as much as it pleases... ♪
- Otto: Livelier!
- Garfield: [sings in livelier and dances] ♪ Come and take a look and see what we got! ‘Cause what we got is a whole lotta lot! Ha, ha! Bop chee bop. Bibbidi bop bop chee bop! ♪ [scats while Vic facepalms] ♪ The tasty goodness is our motto brought to you by Ethel and Otto! ♪ [Otto punches him to a tree. In pain] What was that for?
- Otto: I hate that jingle.
- Garfield: [in pain] You could’ve just told me to stop. [He falls to the ground]
- [Garfield then notices Otto staring forlornly at a female cow, Ethel, being escorted out. The two look at each other lovingly]
- Farmhand: Let’s go, Ethel. Kids are waiting.
- [Ethel is escorted away and Otto sighs sadly before walking away. Feeling bad, Odie walks over to Otto]
- Garfield: Odie, come back! Leave him alone! He might punch you!
- [Odie comes to the bull and sits by his side. Otto warmly smiles, allowing the dog to stay by his side]
- Garfield: [refers to the cow in the farm] Was that Ethel?
- Otto: [He grunts, but Odie whines to the steer. He smiles at the dog before telling his story] A few years back, Old Man Lactose was forced out of business. The corporation that took over separated me from my Ethel. [Cut to a flashback of Otto being put in a wooden box while farmhands are lassoing Ethel, flashback] Ethel!
- Ethel: [flashback] You are my day!
- Otto: [flashback] You are my night! [Soon, the bull was sent out to pasture, separated from the love of his life, voiceover] I was put out to pasture. [Ethel is seen being harassed by children in the amusement park, voiceover] She was put on display as part of the tour. [Cut back to present day] I tried to get in there to break Ethel free, but they stopped me every time. Now I only see her six seconds twice a day.
- Vic: We...we feel you, Otto. Come on, let’s go, Junior. We’ll find another way to break in there.
- Otto: Wha-wha-what could you possibly want from that place?
- Vic: Oh, I don’t know. A couple quarts of milk?
- Garfield: A couple thousand quarts. [Vic nudges him]
- Otto: Good luck.
- Vic: We'll take any help when you have.
- Otto: Pass.
- Vic: I’m telling you, it’s a life-or-death situation.
- Otto: And I hope you’ve notified your next of kin.
- Vic: What if we can get Ethel out?
- Garfield: Or get you a commemorative pin? [Otto quickly returns] Where are we gonna find a commemorative pin?
- [Later, Otto draws up a plan on the ground]
- Otto: Now pay attention. Here’s the perimeter of the plant and here are the two places you need to go. First, the truck with your milk is back here. And this delicate buttercup is my Ethel. My north star and reason for living is being kept by those barbarians in...the petting zoo. Located here. This cricket represents the electrical room. This snail, the refrigeration room. This toadstool is the loading dock, where you’ll find the keys to the trucks. [He sets a pinecone in the middle of the square]
- Garfield: Hey, what’s the pinecone?
- Otto: The pinecone is the cheese and butter room.
- Garfield: Ooh, cheese is my love language.
- Otto: Now, for this briefing, I’ve done a quick reading of your personalities and have chosen tokens to represent each of you. [points to Vic] You are the majestic bullfrog. [A bullfrog appears, croaking]
- Vic: Oh, yeah. That feels right.
- Otto: [points to Odie] You are the curious and clever chipmunk. [A chipmunk appears. Points to Garfield] And you...
- Garfield: Wait for it.
- Otto: [He sets down a roadkill opossum] ...are roadkill.
- Garfield: Huh? What? Oh. [laughs] No, I get it. That’s a good one, Otto. Giving your new best friend roadkill. [pokes at the possum with a stick] Seriously though. What’s my real token?
- Otto: That is your real token. Now, if you have any chance of...
- Garfield: Excuse me. Can I switch to something living like a snail or a cricket?
- Otto: You should’ve spoken up sooner. At this point, it would be too confusing to switch.
- Garfield: Sooner? But you just told me this five seconds ago.
- Vic: Come on, Roadkill. Focus.
- Garfield: Oh, really? You give Vic the majestic bullfrog, you give Odie the curious and clever chipmunk, and then you give me, your new BFF, roadkill? I mean, it feels disrespectful, not gonna lie.
- Otto: What makes you think he’s dead?
- Garfield: My eyes. I have eyes and can see.
- Otto: It’s a possum. They’re masters at playing dead.
- Garfield: Well, then little Daniel Day Possum here should do Shakespeare in the Park.
- Otto: Things aren’t always what they seem.
- Garfield: You’re right. But in this case, they are.
- Otto: What’s the big deal? Possums play dead.
- Garfield: Oh, do they, Otto? Do they play dead? Do possums play possum? Is that what they do?
- Otto: Yes. Possums are very clever.
- Garfield: Well, I’m sure he was until the day he ate a pick-up truck.
- Vic: Uh, just ignore him. Please continue. I’ll just put this back where you had it.
- Otto: The straightest line to the loading dock is through the snail here. Then the cricket there. Cut through the toadstool and armed to the rock. Each of these rooms have their own set of unique challenges.
- Garfield: Well, why can’t we go straight through the pinecone?
- Otto: You don’t want to go through the pinecone.
- Garfield: Looks like the straightest shot is through the pinecone.
- Otto: You like walking with those feet, do you? You a fan of unimaginable pain and misery? Then go through the pinecone.
- Vic: Stay away from the pinecone. [clicks tongue] Got it.
- Otto: Once you’re inside the facility...[Cut to a 2D-animated rundown of the plan as the Mission: Impossible theme plays. Voiceover] You will enter the electrical room. There you will locate the air vent. Pop the grate and climb up. Then you'll crawl through a maze of vents and drop down to the refrigeration room. Next, you will need to hurl your body over a 30-foot drop to a series of hand rungs. You'll propel yourselves hand over hand and drop down directly into a loading dock. From there, you'll locate the keys to the milk truck. Drive that truck to the west pasture of the complex, cut the lock on the gate, and find the closest thing we have to an angel here on earth. You'll escort my sweet Ethel onto the truck and drive her to freedom. [Cut back to reality] It’s going to take mad skills to get that milk and free my dear sweet Ethel. [refers to Odie] Clearly, this one’s qualified for the mission. [refers to Garfield] But I have some serious doubts here about all of...this.
- Vic: He’s pointing to you, Roadkill.
- Otto: Let’s get to work.
- [The others leave and Garfield pokes the opossum with the stick]
- Garfield: Stupid roadkill.
- [Suddenly, the possum springs to life and grabs the stick]
- Roadkill: Hey! [whacks Garfield with the stick] I’m workin’ here! [resumes playing dead]
- Garfield: [groans] Definitely a Monday.
- [Meanwhile, Jon is still on the phone]
- Automated Voice: [on phone] Your call is very important to us. If you’ve lost a cat, please press 1. [Jon presses 1] If your cat is orange, please press 2. [Jon presses 2] This doesn’t really accomplish anything but gives you the false sense that we’re engaged with you.
- [Jon sobs, and hugs a portrait of himself, Garfield and Odie]
- [The next morning, Garfield, Vic, and Odie are ready for training]
- Otto: Alright, gentlemen, I’ve made a list of skills that you’ll need to master in order to break into Lactose Farms. Number one, develop lightning-fast reflexes.
- Vic: You tell Garfield there's a plate of pasta on the other side of the fence, and you will see lightning-fast reflexes.
- Garfield: Yeah, no, no, no. Depends what kind of possum.
- Otto: [holds out a pebble] This pebble represents danger you may encounter. You need to grab it before it grabs you.
- Garfield: [scoffs] It grabs me.
- Otto: Snatch the pebble from my hand. [Garfield tries to grab the pebble, but he moves it away] Too slow! [He whacks Garfield with his horn]
- Garfield: Ow! What was that for?!
- Otto: Being able to grab the pebble could be the difference between life and death.
- Garfield: Alright, let me try that again. [grabs the pebble] Ha! Got it! [Otto whacks him again] What was that for?!
- Otto: It’s never just about the pebble.
- Vic: Come on, Junior. Everyone knows that.
- Otto: Your head’s got to be on a swivel at all times.
- Vic: You gotta be ready for anything.
- Garfield: I was ready! He changed the game!
- Vic: Sounds like someone’s making excuses. [Otto rolls a boulder, and it collides with him, flattening him like a pancake]
- Garfield: And what was that about being ready for anything?
- Vic: [pops back to normal] You were distracting me!
- Garfield: Might I suggest putting your head on a swivel?
- Otto: You should've seen that coming! [as he hits Garfield and Vic] Toes on the line! Watch your grip! Cover your side! There are surprises around every corner at Lactose Farms. You need to stay alert. [squishes Garfield and Vic from above] Too slow! A baby could've seen that coming. Too slow! Too slow! Too slow!
- [As this goes on, Odie gets out a chair and sits down while drinking soda]
- Otto: You'll never make it through Lactose Farms if you can't survive this training. [He throws tree stumps as Garfield and Vic try to dodge them]
- Vic: Are you for real?!
- Garfield: What kind of dairy is this?!
- Otto: The kind of dairy that requires teamwork to survive. Danger could be anywhere gentlemen. You gotta be ready to outrun it! [He lifts up a big tree and charges toward them. Garfield and Vic run away] Here comes the pain!
- Vic: Left, right, left, right.
- Garfield: You’re confusing me!
- [They trip and tumble downhill, sliding on some mud, through the prickly field, jumping into a curvy looped log before coming right out of it, then getting their heads slammed on a beehive, breaking it before seeing their faces covered in bees. Garfield and Vic screamed when sliding down. When they slide by some sleeping rabbits, a mother shushes them as the cats cover their mouths from each other. Once they’re past the rabbits, they screamed again before crashing into a tree]
- Vic: I think I'm gonna need a wring-out.
- [The tree falls and crushes them. Otto and Odie approach them]
- Otto: [to Odie; sighs] If this is going to work, these two have to be on the same page. I’m out of ideas. You got any?
- [Odie gives him a thumbs-up]
- [Odie leads the injured Garfield and Vic to rest by a tree]
- Garfield: Can’t believe I’m out in the middle of nowhere getting beaten up against my will by a former celebrity steer.
- Vic: Odie, can you tell my son to please stop whining?
- Garfield: Odie, can you tell Vic that I collapsed on this tree first and that he needs to find another one?
- Vic: Odie, can you tell my son that I’ll gladly find another one when I get the feeling back in my leg?
- Garfield: Odie, can you tell my father that he wouldn’t be lying in pain if he led a better life and didn’t create problems for himself?
- Vic: Could you please inform my son that he should focus on fixing his own issues?
- Garfield: Odie...[He notices Odie has tied both him and Vic to the tree with vines while they were arguing] Odie, what’d you do? [Odie harrumphs and walks away] After all I’ve let you do for me.
- Vic: What is this? [He tugs on a vine, springing Garfield's foot up. Garfield moves his foot on the vine, making Vic's hand smack himself] Hey, watch it!
- Garfield: [He snickers. Vic pulls on the vine to make Garfield smack his hand on his own face] What’s the problem, Vic? Is this bothering you? [He proceeds to tug the vines to make Vic hit himself]
- Vic: [strained] No. In fact, I don't mind it at all! [He moves the vines in a boxing motion, making Garfield punch himself]
- Garfield: I don't mind it either!
- [Vic and Garfield pull at the vines to hurt each other. Odie and Otto are seen sitting on a branch, with the former eating popcorn]
- Otto: I could watch this all day.
- [Back on Garfield and Vic, they try to get out of the vines]
- Garfield: Stop pulling!
- Vic: I’m not! You’re pulling!
- Garfield: If I was pulling, you knew it! [grunting] Why does everything you do always end up hurting me?
- Vic: Hurt you?! All I ever did was try to help you!
- Garfield: Oh, you sure? Cause every time you're around, it ends up with me in pain. [as he get hit by a branch] Ow! Odie, these ropes are not funny anymore...[as he get hit by a branch again]...OW!
- [Odie and Otto fist-bump]
- Vic: Maybe, if you were a little more open to seeing me, things might be better between us.
- Garfield: Oh, you do remember you were the one who left me in an alley, right?
- Vic: You don't know what you're talking about!
- Garfield: [clears throat] Then please enlighten me.
- [Vic sighs in sadness. On Otto and Odie...]
- Otto: This is about to get real.
- [Back on Garfield and Vic...]
- Garfield: Oh, that's right. You're normally never around to actually defend yourself. No back door to slink out of this time. First, you abandoned me! Years later, you pulled me into a life of crime. Well, classic "Father of the Year" stuff, Dad. You know why would I ever think that seeing you could be anything other than a train wreck!?
- Vic: [angry] I DID NOT LEAVE YOU IN THAT ALLEY!
- Garfield: [bitterly] Oh, you did, you told me you'd come right back. You never did!
- Vic: [solemnly] No! That is not what happened.
- Garfield: Oh, please! You're probably on the run from someone like Jinx and I was in the way.
- Vic: No...No, that...that night...[sighs] That night was different...
- [In a flashback, Vic sits by a bookstore called "Jim's Comic Books" while cradling Garfield, as a kitten, as people walk past them. Garfield's stomach grumbles. Vic spots a fish market across the street. They approach it, and stare at the fish]
- Fish Market Worker: Hey! Shoo, shoo! Get out of here!
- [The worker chases them out. Vic runs off, then sees a hot dog stand. A dog growls at them. Vic quickly retreats down an alley, then stops by a dumpster with the wooden crate from the beginning of the film. Vic spots a food worker coming out of a restaurant to dump out garbage before re-entering. Vic looks over his shoulder, then places Garfield in the crate while petting his head]
- Vic: Wait here, Junior. I’ll be right back. [approaches the garbage can, only to be scared off by the worker]
- Food Worker: Hey, get out of here! [Vic waits by as the food worker talks on his phone; on phone] Hey, how are you doing? Yeah, yeah. Ah, I had to shoo a cat. Yeah, yeah. Digging in the trash. Yeah. So what you up to now, huh? Still taking it easy? Uh-huh. Yeah. [Time passes. It’s raining, but the worker is still on the phone; on phone] Oh, no, you're kidding. Really? [chuckles] Oh, yeah, yeah. It's been raining here for a while now. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I'll see you then. OK, bye.
- [The worker goes back in the building. Vic comes over to find a sardine in the trash can. He grabs the lid as a dish, and runs back to the crate where Garfield was, only to find out that he'd disappeared. He looks around until he finds Garfield in Mamma Leoni's with Jon. Vic narrows his eyes as he walks over to the window. Through the window, Jon holds out a finger which Garfield waves his paws at. Vic watches Jon feed Garfield a slice of pizza. He looks over at the sardine on the lid, then looks sadly over at his son, who nuzzles with Jon. Dropping the lid, Vic smiles warmly, then looks alarmed as Jon chases Garfield around the restaurant. He then runs off to hide. Jon exits with the take-out box. The lid pops open, revealing Garfield, who looks up and down the street, seeing that there's no sign of Vic. As he stares sadly, he then smiles at Jon, who smiles back at him. Vic comes out from behind a mailbox to watch Garfield kissing Jon on his nose, then nuzzles him. Vic watches sadly as Jon leaves with Garfield. He ducks down behind the mailbox with a sad expression. In the present, Garfield stares wide-eyed about what happened]
- Garfield: [shocked] I… I never knew.
- Vic: I know, how could you?
- Garfield: Why didn't you ever come visit me?
- Vic: I did. A million times I… came to knock on your door, and I'd see what a great life you've had with Jon, so I just...thought it would be better if I kept my distance.
- Otto: [appears before Garfield and Vic] I sense a positive breakthrough in your relationship, am I wrong? [Vic shakes his head] Good. After an extensive evaluation, I have concluded that you two are, in fact, ready to move forward with this mission.
- Vic: We are?
- Garfield: How is that even possible?
- [Odie cuts down the vines with a pair of scissors]
- Otto: Mathematically, it isn’t. But given your present levels of incompetence and overall lack of basic skills...
- Garfield: Huh?
- Otto: I have determined it would take roughly...17 years to get you both properly ready for this job. And since we have..less than 48 hours, you passed. Congratulations.
- [Odie shakes their hands and hugs Garfield. Up in the tree, Roland and Nolan are spying on them while disguised as birds]
- [Back in the mall, Jinx sings in French while scribbling something with a red marker. Then, she cuts paper with scissors and some tape with her claw. Soon, she hangs up three images of Vic on a board full of pictures. It is clear that she resents Vic for the failed heist. Jinx laughs evilly while scratching one picture before noticing her hench-dogs have returned]
- Roland: She’s really losing it.
- Jinx: [shakes off the tape] Yes, what is it?
- Roland: They’re ready to rob the dairy.
- Jinx: Purrrfect! Oh, everything is coming to plan. Now it’s time to make the call. [Roland gets out a cellphone from his folds] Excuse me, you keep that thing in your folds? That is so disgusting. [to Nolan] You, you dial the number and put me on speaker. [Nolan dials the number and puts on the speaker]
- Female Phone Operator: [on phone] Hello?
- Jinx: [on phone] Hello? Lactose Farms?
- Female Phone Operator: [on phone] How may I help you?
- Jinx: [on phone] It’s come to my attention that there will be an attempt to rob one of your dairy trucks tomorrow. It’s not important who I am or how I came to know this. Just think of me as a concerned citizen intent on fulfilling my civic responsibility as well as...
- [On the other side, the phone operators only hear meowing on the speaker. One of the operators goes to the office of his superior]
- Male Phone Operator: Uh, chief? We may have a situation.
- Marge Malone: [grabs her nightstick] Well, okay then. Let’s go have a look-see.
- [They check the speaker with Jinx still talking...or meowing]'
- Female Phone Operator: This is the third time they called.
- Male Phone Operator: It just sounds like a cat crank-calling us.
- Marge Malone: [shoves her nightstick at his nose] If it were a dog barking, I’d be on board for a prank. Some dogs are born for mischief. They just are. Not cats. Oh, no. Cats mean business. [She gets out her phone, uses the Critter Talk, and selects a cat to translate the meowing]
- Jinx: [on phone] I repeat, there will be an attempt to rob one of your dairy trucks tomorrow. I suggest you take appropriate measures to prevent this brazen thievery from occurring. Okay, I’m done. Hang up the phone. Ha, ha. What an evil genius I am. [hangs up]
- Marge Malone: Well then, still seem like a prank to ya?
- Male Phone Operator: Eh, that last part did a little.
- Female Phone Operator: What’s our next move, chief?
- Marge Malone: Our next move is for me to go back to my office and formulate an ingenious plan. And you go get my car waxed. [She enters her office and approaches the mirror, to herself] Well, well, well. Would you look at that, Margie Malone? We’re having company tomorrow. I guess I better take out my finest China to serve a heaping plate...[puts on her hat] of justice!
- [In the morning, Back with the animals, Otto sets down acorn earpieces]
- Garfield: What are those for?
- Otto: For us to communicate. Once you’re inside...the belly of the beast.
- [Odie growls in determination]
- Garfield: Uh, okay. Don’t we need something more like radio headsets?
- Otto: [sighs] Indoor cat. These are better.
- Garfield: I just feel like Bluetooth would be better.
- Otto: These are better than Bluetooth.
- Garfield: These are better than Bluetooth?
- Otto: They’re equal, and I don’t have to pay for the brand. [He and Odie put acorn pieces in their ears. On com] Gold Eagle to Chipmunk, do you copy?
- [Odie barks back]
- Garfield: Of course you can hear him. He’s standing three feet away from you. [Otto snorts and gets out binoculars] Oh, I see you sprung for the binoculars.
- Otto: Now, we just need to find… a way in.
- Garfield: Anyone ever told you that you take a lot of dramatic pauses when you speak?
- Otto: [a beat] Yes. [He spots some kids exiting a school bus with one having an animal backpack] Bingo.
- [Inside Lactose Farms, a tour is going on]
- Tour Guide Tracy: Hello, everyone, and welcome to the one, the only Lactose Farms! If you will all gather around me, we’ll begin our tour and head into the heart of the farm.
- Marge Malone: [She carefully watches surveillance footage for any robbers] I know you’re here. I can feel it. Show yourself.
- [Back in the tour...]
- Tour Guide Tracy: Today, you will discover the answers to all of your dairy questions. Including the most-asked dairy question of all time, “Are curds the way?”
- [We see Garfield, Odie, and Vic going incognito as backpacks]
- Otto: [on com] Bullfrog, Chipmunk, Roadkill, do you copy?
- Garfield: Are you kidding me? They actually work? You should take this to Shark Tank.
- Otto: [on com] Now remember, the only way to get the keys to the milk truck and free Ethel undetected is by sneaking to the path I’ve mapped out for you. If you deviate from that path, you will trigger security and all bets are off. Understood? Alright, look alive. The electrical answers door should be coming up on your left.
- Tour Guide Tracy: [offscreen] Okay, this way.
- Vic: [He spots the door to the electrical room] Hey, look! There it is!
- [The three animals sneak off to the electrical room without being spotted]
- Garfield: [on com] Okay, we’re in.
- Otto: [on com] Continue through and locate the air vent at the end of the hallway. That will take you to the refrigeration room.
- [They spot the air vent at the end of the hallway]
- PA Announcer: [via intercom] Factory workers, your 15-minute break begins now.
- [They run off as employees come out the door. They walk past a janitor, not knowing it’s actually Vic, Garfield, and Odie]
- Garfield: Blech! Ugh, your feet need a deep rinse!
- [They remove the disguise and open the air vent. Odie and Vic get in, but Garfield gets stuck in between]
- Vic: What’s the hold up, Junior?
- Garfield: How did you get through this? You’re bigger than me!
- Vic: [his stomach gurgles] Am I?
- Garfield: Yes!
- Vic: Well, the vent don’t agree. Try sucking in your gut! [He and Odie start pulling at Garfield]
- Garfield: I am!
- Vic: Try sucking in your butt and your gut!
- [They pull Garfield off and they end up sliding down three separate paths. Soon, Garfield falls on the vent and plops down in the middle of a big platform. Vic and Odie arrive nearby]
- Otto: [on com] Bullfrog, what’s happening now?
- Vic: We fell out of a vent, into a room that looks like it was full of heavy machinery.
- Otto: [on com] Son of a cud. You’re in the pinecone.
- Marge Malone: [She spots Garfield in the security footage] Jiminy Davis! The perp is a cat, and this one looks like it could eat us out of business!
- [Cut back to the animals, Garfield spots the loading dock in the distance]
- Garfield: Oh, Vic, Vic! Look! There’s the loading dock!
- Vic: Junior! Don’t move!
- Garfield: What, why?
- Vic: We’re in the middle of the pinecone! Otto told us to stay out of the pinecone!
- Garfield: Oh, stop. There’s no pinecone. Otto’s a bit of a worrywart. I can walk to the loading dock from here. [He tries to walk, but the floor opens beneath his feet, and he falls in]
- Vic: Junior!
- Garfield: [Then, he rises out on top of a big slice of cheddar cheese, eating part of it] Mmm. Oh, cheddar. Probably one of my top 26 favorite cheeses. [Vic stares at Odie, who shrugs. He notices a timer ticking down] What do you think happens when that gets to zero?
- [It hits zero and the cheddar cheese is moved out with Garfield on it]
- Otto: [on com] Bullfrog, what’s happening now?
- Vic: [on com] Roadkill got carried away to the pinecone!
- Otto: [on com] Listen to me. You have to carry on with the mission. Get to the loading dock before the workers return from their break or you’ll miss your only chance to get that truck.
- Garfield: [As he rides down the cheddar cheese...] No, no, no, ah! [It gets onto a grater slide]
- Computer: Shred sequence initiated.
- [The cheddar cheese slides down, shredding bit by bit by the grater slide. Odie barking]
- Garfield: Odie! Thanks, buddy, but I’m already full from the cheddar. [Odie barks to Garfield to jump off the cheddar he’s on] Oh, jump off? Good idea! [He jumps off and grabs onto another piece of cheese hanging next to Odie.]
- Vic: Oh, good. He’s safe.
- [However, Garfield’s cheese piece is moving away from Odie’s]
- Garfield: Uh, hang on. Wait, where am I going? [He spots a sign saying, “FONDUE AREA”] Fondue? [He sees approaching some giant pots of boiling melted cheese] Oh, no! [He tries to get away by jumping from cheese block to cheese block]
- [Odie barks in fear before spotting some cheese sticks being made. He grabs one and peels it to make rope. Garfield falls and is about to enter the hot fondue, but Odie lassos his friend away. However, Garfield ends up on a big block of butter. Knives drop down to cut it and Garfield dodges the blades. Odie rushes over to grab Garfield, but they're about to be cut by the blades]
- Vic: Junior! [As the two dodge the knives, Vic jumps to the rescue. He walks across some steamy fondue, bounces off a hot pot, and walks on more fondue. Just as the knives prepare to chop up Garfield and Odie...] Junior! [He jumps in and saves them as the blades come down. As they pant, Vic holds up his severed tail] That was too close even for me.
- Garfield: [pants] Thanks.
- Vic: I couldn’t let you have all the fun.
- PA Announcer: [via intercom] Workers, your break ends in 5 minutes.
- [They all rush out to the loading dock]
- Garfield: [on com] Okay, Otto, we’re in the loading dock. Where are the keys?
- Otto: [on com] They should be hanging on a pegboard on the far wall.
- [Odie barks to Garfield]
- Garfield: What do you mean we have a problem?
- [Odie points to the pegboard, empty of keys]
- Garfield: The pegboard is empty!
- Otto: [on com] Empty?
- Marge Malone: Now would you look at this? Three misguided stray pets trying to steal a truck of milk. Never a dull moment at this dairy, is there, Margie? You were looking for these, aren’t ya? Oh, here you go then. [She throws them the keys and Garfield tries to get them, but they reel back to her] So, how’s this gonna play out, fellas? The easy way or the hard way? And just so you know, I’m up for either.
- Garfield: [He spots a chair and nearby gets an idea] Follow my lead.
- Vic: Huh? What?
- [Garfield rushes to the chair and charges it toward Marge. Unfortunately, the guard binds Garfield's ankle with some restraints. Vic groans in dismay while Odie shakes his head]
- Marge Malone: [cracks her neck] Who’s next then? [She chases after Vic and Odie]
- Garfield: [on com] Otto, that security guard has the truck keys!
- Otto: [on com] Crazy eyes? Tragic sense of fashion?
- Garfield: [on com] Yeah. How did you know?
- Otto: [on com] Marge Malone. [Cut to a flashback showing Marge towing him away from Ethel. Flashback] Ethel!
- Ethel: [flashback] Otto!
- [Cut back to present day]
- Otto: [on com] She’s not just my nemesis. She’s also my… enemy.
- Garfield: [on com] Love to hear about it, but right now, what do we do?
- Otto: [on com] Get those keys. I’ll create a distraction so you can get out of there. [As he runs off]
- Marge Malone: [She tries to get Vic and Odie] Come here, you!
- [Garfield hops over to a janitor's bucket and uses the mop to row across the floor. Marge is about to capture the two when the mop hits her head, obscuring her vision. Garfield grabs the keys from her]
- Garfield: You see that? That’s indoor cat style!
- [As the three rush to the truck, Marge gets the mop off her head and blocks their path before electrocuting Garfield with an electric rod. As Garfield lands in Vic and Odie's arms, the keys fly back to Marge via electric rod]
- Marge Malone: No, no, no, no, you’re not getting away. I’ve already called the pound. Your days of thievery end today.
- [Suddenly, the alarm blares]
- PA Announcer: [via intercom] Attempted Perimeter breach!
- Marge Malone: [She looks at the security footage to find Otto trying to open the gates] Otto..!
- Vic: [He looks at the button and the milk truck before getting a plan with a regretful look] Junior, sorry about this.
- Garfield: Sorry? For what? [Vic pushes him and Odie onto Marge, making her lose the keys. As Vic grabs the keys, Garfield is shocked] Vic?! [Vic presses the button to close the gate in front of the two and Marge. He then gets to the milk truck and turns back to look at his son with regret] What are you doing?! [Vic gets inside the milk truck] Vic! Don’t you go again! Please! [Vic drives off, leaving him and Odie with Marge]
- Marge Malone: [on com] Send security to the loading dock.
- [Vic bursts through the gates of Lactose Farms. Otto sees Ethel standing a few feet across]
- Ethel: Otto!
- [Otto tries to run over to Ethel, but Marge drives in to stop him]
- Marge Malone: You do not want to try me today, mister!
- [Workers arrive to surround Otto with electric rods while Ethel is corralled. Otto roars and charges, hitting Marge's car. Marge then zaps him with the rod]
- Marge Malone: Get him!
- [Otto is forced to retreat while Garfield and Odie are put in the back of the pound truck]
- [As Vic drives the milk truck, he spots Roland and Nolan on the road. He screams and stomps on the brake, stopping the truck while it boops Roland on the nose]
- Jinx: [offscreen] Welcome back...[appears] Victor!
- Vic: Hey, Jinx. Why you here? I was-I was bringing this to you.
- Jinx: Were you? Really?
- Vic: Of course it was. That’s what we agreed to, right?
- Jinx: Mmm.
- Vic: [sighs] So, you and me square now?
- Jinx: [chuckles] Not quite. There’s still the matter of those five years I lost because of you?
- Vic: What? But I thought this settled that.
- Jinx: [laughs evilly] It was never about the milk. It was about you getting caught trying to steal it and being sent to the pound. Like I was. You see, Vic, I needed you to suffer. Like I did.
- Vic: Oh. I see. And I’m guessing you have an idea about how that should happen.
- Jinx: As a matter of fact, I do.
- [In the pound truck, Garfield and Odie sulk about their failed mission caused Vic’s abandonment]
- Garfield: [heartbroken] I can't believe he did that. He ran out and left me...again. I thought he changed, but it was...it was a lie. All of it...[sighs] How could I have been so stupid? [Fade to he's inside a cage in the pound]
- Maurice: Oh, come on, kid. Don’t beat yourself up. Vic, man. We’ve all been burned by Vic.
- [The other caged cats grumble and agree]
- Olivia: Oh, yeah, the one thing about Vic you can count on is that you can’t count on him.
- Garfield: Tell me about it.
- Maurice: Yeah, I tell you about it. Long story short, we all used to run in a pack until we had to kick him off the crew.
- [The cats chatter in agreement]
- Olivia: Like I said, couldn’t count on him.
- Garfield: Sounds about right.
- Snickers: He’d leave in the middle of the job just to go see his kid.
- Maurice: Yeah. He said he wanted to check up on him. Make sure he was doing okay.
- Olivia: But get this, he never actually visits. He’d just sit across the street from his kid’s house in a giant oak tree.
- Garfield: That never happened.
- Olivia: He watched that kid eat and eat...
- Cats: ...And eat and eat and eat...
- Snickers: He put a notch in the bark. Every time he was there.
- Garfield: [sarcastic] Oh, yeah. Sure he did.
- Olivia: And he’d go every Sunday night rain or shine. Said that it was his kid’s...
- Cats: Family dinner night.
- Garfield: Okay, hate to tell you guys, I guaranteed that never happened. Okay? You all fell for another one of Vic’s lies. We all have ‘cause that’s what he does best. [Just then, Odie arrives outside Garfield’s cage] Odie! Odie! How’d you get out? Quick! Pick the lock on my cage!
- Jon: [arrives at the pound] Garfield! There you are!
- Garfield: Jon! Oh, take me away from all of this! You can’t imagine what I’ve been through!
- Female Pound Worker: You want this one, too?
- Jon: Uh, yes, I do.
- Female Pound Worker: You sure he's yours? He didn't have a tag.
- Jon: Uh-huh. Yeah. Oh, he has a tag. [shows her the collar and tag on Garfield’s neck]
- Garfield: [dumbfounded] I have a collar and a tag? How long have I had those?
- Female Pound Worker: OK, I’m just gonna need you to hold…
- Jon: [snaps] I WILL NOT HOLD! I AM DONE HOLDING! THE JON WHO WAS ON HOLD IS DEAD! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!
- [Soon, Garfield and Odie are back home]
- Garfield: That’s right! I’m back, baby! [rushes over to his favorite chair] I was just talking about you, wasn’t I? [presses the button to put it in recliner mode] Oh, I’ve missed you, too. [turns on the TV to watch Catflix, then rushes over to Pooky and his bed] Pooky! I have a lot to tell you. You’re never gonna believe it. Crazy stuff happened. I slept outside twice! I know. Oh, and I made you this commemorative pin. [gets out a pin and puts it on Pooky]
- Jon: [offscreen] Dinner time!
- Garfield: Talk later! [kisses Pooky and runs off]
- [Garfield gets on the stair railing, slides down, jumps off, and floats down with an umbrella. He dances over to the dinner table, where Jon serves up lasagna for dinner. Garfield takes in the smell and Jon grates cheese on top of the food]
- Jon: Say when?
- Garfield: Never, Jon! Bury me in cheese!
- Jon: I have two more in the freezer. Let me know when you want them. [timer dings] I’m gonna go check on dessert.
- Garfield: Oh, I apologize in advance. [gets out a fork and a knife] The eating you are about to see will not be pretty. And if you have young children, this would be a good time for them to leave the room.
- Odie: Mm-hmm!
- [Garfield prepares to dig in until he notices a giant oak tree across the house]
- Olivia: [voiceover] He’d just sit across the street from his kid’s house in a giant oak tree.
- Garfield: [He gets up from his seat and walks away. His stomach growls and tries to steer him back to the table] I know, I know. We’re coming back. [his stomach growls] I just need to check something out first. [He leaves the house and walks to the oak tree, causing a bit of traffic along the way]
- Snickers: [voiceover] He put a notch in the bark. Every time he was there.
- Garfield: [He climbs up the tree and looks around for a notch] He left a notch. [sighs] Yeah, right. [He looks up to see one notch followed by tons of notches scratched everywhere on the tree] He was here. He saw me grow up.
- [Odie barks from below and Garfield uses his claws to slide down the tree]
- Garfield: Oh. Ow. Wow. That really strings. I don’t know why I didn’t think it would. Give me a second. [gets off the tree and hugs Odie] Vic loves us! Me first, of course, but then you too, but me a lot. At first. [Odie scoffs] Wait, wait, wait, wait, but if he loves me, us, why would he let me, us, get captured at the dairy? Unless...[gasps] he wanted us to get captured! [As he walks down the street, he causes more traffic]
- Driver: Hey, watch it!
- Garfield: Yes! He knew that Jinx wasn’t going to let him off the hook, but if we got caught, we get sent to the pound and Jon would come and get us! [Odie gets him off the road] Don’t you see, Odie? He was trying to save us!
- Driver: [offscreen] Losers!
- Garfield: We have to go save my dad!
- [Back in the kitchen, Jon wheels in a big candy volcano]
- Jon: And here’s your favorite dessert, Mount Candy-toa! [notices they’re gone] Uh, guys? [He sees the two pets leaving and the volcano erupts, covering the entire kitchen and himself in candy] Oh, come on!
- [Garfield and Odie head back to the mall, where they find Jinx’s big board]
- Garfield: What is this? [They see pictures of Vic being scratched out before seeing a negative review on Mamma Leoni’s. Gasps in horrified] Half a star for Mamma Leoni’s?! [Growls in anger] She’s a monster!
- [Then, they see drawings of what Jinx plans to do to Vic]
- Garfield: She’s gonna tie him up.. take him on a train...[gasps] She’s gonna throw him off the Mile High Bridge! We’re gonna need help. But who can we call? [Odie gets out an acorn earpiece. Gasps] Ugh, you got a waxy buildup. What’s your q-tip routine? [Odie groans] You’re right, you’re right. We can deal with this situation later. [puts the acorn piece in his ear] Hello? Hello? Is anyone there? Hello?
- Otto: [on com] Get off the line. This acorn call is for emergency use only.
- Garfield: [on com] Otto! Otto, please listen. I wanna make good on our original deal. But.. But I need a favor first. [a beat] Otto, are you still there or are you taking a dramatic pause?
- Otto: [on com; then] I’m listening.
- [In the train, Vic is tied up while hanging upside down]
- Jinx: You know, Vic, you only have yourself to blame for this.
- [Roland plays the violin for dramatic music]
- Vic: Right. Look, there’s got to be some way for me to make this right. I mean, I know we can think of something.
- Jinx: Oh, there is, and you will.
- [Roland continues playing while Nolan uses a flashlight for dramatic lighting. As the train goes down the track]
- [Garfield and Otto approach the tree]
- Garfield: So, once I get on the train, I untie Vic and we jump off right as the train gets to the bridge.
- Otto: Correct. Chipmunk will be waiting for you.
- [Cut to Odie, he has made a net at the bottom of a cliff with spikes]
- Otto: [on com] Confirm your status, Chipmunk.
- [Odie barks with a thumbs-up. Otto pulls back the branch while Garfield puts on his stunt suit]
- Otto: If you don’t jump right as the train gets to the bridge, you’ll miss the net.
- Garfield: Got it. It’s getting close.
- Otto: Have you considered throwing a rope over a branch and just swinging onto the passing train instead?
- Garfield: You watch too much TV.
- Otto: I’ve never watched TV.
- Garfield: This way is much better than your rope idea.
- Otto: Better than the versatile, reliable rope?
- Garfield: Look, I’ve studied the science. I know what I’m doing.
- Otto: And you think you can battle these villains on your own?
- Garfield: Oh, yeah. I have a plan. [speaks on com] Odie, make the order.
- [Odie barks and gets out Jon’s phone, confirming a new delivery]
- Garfield: Now get ready to fling me in the direction of that moving train. [As the train approaches...] Get ready. If I don’t make it back, tell my story. [The train comes near] Now! [Otto lets go of the branch, sending him flying]
- Otto: [on com] Roadkill, you’re too high! You’re gonna miss it!
- Garfield: [on com] No, no, this is how you do it. It’s called a ricochet approach. [He gets kicked off by a billy goat, knocking him out of his suit. Then, he bounces off Otto’s belly]
- [Cut to the train, Jinx sees a sign saying, "MILE HIGH BRIDGE - 5 MILES AHEAD"]
- Jinx: [laughs evilly] It won’t be long now! I can’t tell you how excited I am for what’s about to happen next!
- [Suddenly, Garfield flies into her, knocking her into Roland and Nolan. He then runs over to his dad]
- Garfield: Dad, I’m here to rescue you!
- Vic: No, no, no, no, no, Junior, get out of here!
- Garfield: I'm gonna untie you and we're gonna jump off the train!
- Vic: NO, JUST LEAVE ME AND GO!
- Garfield: I DIDN'T COME THIS FAR JUST TO TURN AROUND! LET ME UNTIE YOU!
- Jinx: [She grabs a nearby axe] You’re ruining everything! [She swings it down, but Garfield has it cut the rope instead, freeing Vic]
- Garfield: Hurry! This way. [He and Vic carefully walk the side of the train car. As Garfield spots a ladder close by, Jinx summons her henchdogs]
- Jinx: [groans] You half-wit! Get them!
- [Garfield climbs to the top of the car. Vic tries to cross when Roland opens the door and tries to grab him. Vic throws the rope to Garfield, and he pulls him up. They see some oncoming branches and dodge them. Garfield sees the sign saying, "MILE HIGH BRIDGE - 3 MILES AHEAD"]
- Garfield: The bridge is coming up! We gotta get to the caboose now!
- Vic: What? Why?
- Garfield: Just follow my lead!
- [As they run toward the caboose, Roland appears in front of their path. They turn back, only to see Nolan. The two cats are surrounded]
- Roland: Oy, kitty cat. Do you really expect to take on us all by yourself?
- Garfield: No. I brought...takeout.
- Roland: Huh?
- Nolan: Huh?
- [Up in the sky, we see tons of drones flying in with deliveries as the Top Gun theme plays. Garfield gets out of the rope and grabs onto a drone, flying up. He stuffs meatballs in his mouth and jumps down onto the train car, shooting them like a machine gun. They hit Nolan away and Jinx growls at this. Then, Garfield gets onto another drone to pour dressing on the salad. He throws the salad on the roof, making Roland slip on it]
- Garfield: I never understood the purpose of salad until...[he throws a salad leaf away]...this exact moment.
- [Vic trips Roland. However, Garfield sees another sign saying, "MILE HIGH BRIDGE - 1 MILE AHEAD." Time is running out. He flies over to his dad]
- Garfield: Go, go! Now! [He and Vic head toward the caboose]
- Jinx: Get after them!
- [Roland chases them down. As Vic tries to jump, the big dog pulls him back by the rope. Garfield turns back and grabs a season shaker to pour it on Roland's eyes, stinging him. The cat hops over from one box to another]
- Garfield: Yeah, in case you were wondering, I do my own stunts. Me...and Tom Cruise.
- [Jinx grabs the box he's on, spins him around, and throws him off]
- Vic: Junior!
- [Luckily, Garfield gets on another. Vic cheers for his son]
- Jinx: [to her hench-dogs] Stop him!
- [Garfield hops across a path of pizza boxes and grabs a container of Mamma Leoni's Hot Sauce. He opens it and gulps the sauce down. He then gets on the train car and breaths fire at the villains, scaring them off]
- Vic: Now that’s amazing!
- Garfield: [his tongue numb] I can’t feel my tongue!
- Otto: [on com] Roadkill, are you at the caboose ready to jump?
- [Garfield sees the caboose being a few train cars away. He sees a hanging tree branch and gets an idea. He uses the rope to catch the branch and swing him and his father to the caboose. However, the two cats hang by both sides of the car. Vic makes it while Garfield flies around and runs across a wall]
- Garfield: Dad! Dad!
- Vic: Jump, Junior! I’ll catch you!
- [Garfield jumps and Vic catches him. He pulls his son in for a hug, but they see the villains glaring from inside the car. Garfield sees a sign reading, "MILE HIGH BRIDGE AHEAD". They have arrived at the Mile High Bridge]
- Vic: What do we do now?
- Garfield: We do this! [He pushes Vic off the train] See you, everyone! [He falls off but notices his dad flying up]
- Vic: [flying up] The net’s too tight!
- Otto: [on com] Roadkill, the net is too tight!
- Garfield: [on com] I heard! [He bounces off the net and he and his father crash through the caboose]
- Jinx: Hello again! Welcome back. Now, where were we? [Soon, the two dogs hang Garfield and Vic over the side of the train, ready to drop them] No, no, don’t throw them over just yet! I want to find the perfect place for them to make the biggest splat.
- Vic: Hey, Junior. Junior, Junior.
- Jinx: Get ready! Almost there!
- Garfield: Sorry my rescue didn’t work out.
- Vic: No, you gave me another chance. That’s all that matters.
- [Garfield smiles at his father. Roland and Nolan see this, touched at the father and son moment]
- Jinx: Now! Now! Drop them now! [gasps] What are you waiting for?!
- [However, the two dogs refuse to drop Garfield and Vic]
- Roland: Their love for one another indicates that despite their current circumstance, they are at peace. [Nolan nods] Because...they are together.
- Jinx: So?
- Nolan: If the point of your revenge was to hurt them...It has done the opposite. It’s actually textbook irony!
- Roland: And we’re no longer comfortable with your plan! [Nolan nods]
- Jinx: You two are still as weak as you were when I found you sniveling in the pound! [imitates Roland] "Oooh, no one will adopt us. I never grew into my folds. I hide behind them because I'm socially awkward." [imitates Nolan] "Please! Somebody love me even if I can’t sit still for more than 10 seconds and have the attention span of A BLOODY GOLDFISH!!"
- Roland: We did everything you ever asked of us. I even spoke with this ridiculous accent to make you feel more at home! But no more! [speaks in a Brooklyn accent] I’m New York, loud and proud! I love myself the way I am, and I’m a big, brave boy, baby!
- Nolan: I’ve been working on my attention span! [notices a hot air balloon and gasps] Is that a hot air balloon?
- Jinx: [growls as her mood necklace turns red, furiously] You two...are...WORTHLESS!! [She pushes her former hench-dogs and the cats off the train. She laughs evilly, only to get knocked off by an overpass]
- [As Garfield, Vic, Roland, and Nolan fall, they all grab hands and Roland’s folds open up like a parachute, floating them safely down]
- Garfield: Might I just say, as someone else with a zaftig figure, you have a beautiful body, sir.
- [Unfortunately, they give way...]
- Roland: Oh, dear!
- [...and they resume falling down. Just then, Otto swings in on rope, saving them all]
- Otto: Rope. Versatile. Reliable.
- Garfield: There’s something about your cadence that really throws me, but thank you.
- [Otto also grabs the falling Jinx and sets the five of them on the net. Jinx ends up getting stuck. Nolan cackles at this]
- Roland: Tee-hee.
- [Odie licks Garfield before embracing him]
- Vic: Tossing me off the train? Did not see that coming.
- Garfield: Well, when you live in the wild, you gotta keep your head on a swivel.
- Vic: Right.
- Garfield: [eats a leaf] It’s basic Outdoor Cat 101.... [then] And that had bird poop on it! [spits it out]
- Otto: Hey, you good, Roadkill?
- Garfield: Not quite. There’s one last thing to take care of. Cut to...
- [Cut to nighttime on a bridge, away from the city. Marge drives up to meet with a mystery figure holding a kennel]
- Garfield: [voiceover] It was a dark and foggy night. The air was damp and heavier than a broken pipe. On nights like this, you can’t swing a cat without hitting shady characters making shady deals all over town. [Marge flashes headlights at the figure, who flashes his flashlight back. Voiceover] Oh, but this night was going to be different. Justice was about to be served with a helping of retribution on the side.
- Marge Malone: [She steps out of the truck] Is that the package?
- Garfield: [disguised voice] It is.
- Marge Malone: Well, we have a deal. [She whistles and Ethel steps out of the truck]
- Garfield: [disguised voice] No one will come looking for her?
- Marge Malone: Nope. I did what you said. I burned her paperwork, and then shredded it, and burned it some more. It’s like she never existed. Except for the image of her face on millions of dairy products.
- [Ethel comes over to the figure, who gives Marge the kennel and some keys. The mystery figure is actually the three animals with Garfield using the same Critter Talk app to mask his voice]
- Garfield: [disguised voice] This...never happened.
- Marge Malone: Agreed. [She leaves with the cage, revealing Jinx inside it. She growls at Marge] Oh, save it, Cat Fancy! I know you planned the milk truck heist and then tried to throw those innocent cats off a train to cover it up. The boys told me everything.
- [Jinx sees her former henchdogs now working for Marge. She hisses at them. Meanwhile, Ethel looks around until she finds Otto]
- Ethel: Otto! [hugs Otto] You are my day.
- Otto: You are my night.
- [Otto and Ethel stare lovingly at each other. Otto sprays cologne in his mouth and prepares to kiss her, but Ethel leaps onto him and they both have a romantic kiss]
- [The next morning, Garfield, Odie, and Vic arrive at Jon’s house]
- Garfield: Uh...[sighs] Well, this is us.
- Vic: Right. Your home. I just..
- Garfield: I just wanted to say I’m sorry.
- Vic: I’m sorry. What are you sorry for?
- Garfield: For misjudging you.
- Vic: Oh. Well, thanks. Well, I just wanted to apologize to you for…
- Garfield: Everything bad that happened to us the last three days?
- Vic: You know, you had your hand in a few bad decisions back there, too, but...[sighs] Yeah, I’m sorry for dragging you into my world. This is where you belong here. Here with Jon and...[to Odie] what’s your name again? Odor?
- Odie: Huh?! [growls then pants happily before hugging Vic]
- Vic: So, um, I should go.
- Garfield: Yeah, yeah. I mean, unless you want to come in.
- Vic: I don’t know. I don’t think that would work. I’m...I’m an outdoor cat.
- Garfield: Right. Sure, sure. No, I just...I figured...
- Vic: No, no, no, I get it. But you know, I got this thing on the other side of town I gotta go do, so...
- Garfield: No, I’m very busy, too. Yeah.
- Vic: See you around then?
- Garfield: You know where to find me.
- Vic: In the kitchen. Well, take care. And remember, [imitates Otto] stay out of the pinecone. [He leaves the two alone and Odie barks at Garfield]
- Garfield: What? You heard him. It’s for the best.
- Odie: [shakes his head] Mm-mm.
- [They go inside the house and reunite with their owner]
- Jon Arbuckle: Oh, you’re back! What is going on? Are you okay? I was so worried! I was gonna add more locks to the door. You know, try to keep you in, but then I thought, well, what if they wanted to be outdoor pets? Do you want to be free range? [They shake their heads “no”. Sighs in relief] I really missed you, guys, and I gotta say it’s great to be together again, the whole entire family. You have no idea what the last few days have been like: phone calls and hold times and tears...
- [As Jon talks, Odie barks to Garfield]
- Garfield: Don’t give me that. I asked him to stay. [Odie grumbles] He wanted to leave. [Odie groans] You heard him. He said he had to...[Odie growls] Well, I-I...[Odie growls again; groans] Fine. I’ll be right back. [He heads out of the house]
- Jon Arbuckle: Wait! Wait! What? Am I using trigger words that I’m not aware of? [Odie pats his shoulder]
- [In outside, Garfield running far away and he stops and he look sideways of the neighborhood, and then Garfield approaches the oak tree where his father is]
- Garfield: So, you coming in or do we have to bring food up there to you?
- Vic: I’ll come to you. I just need to finish something up here. [He comes down, Garfield hugs him in embrace, and they back to the house]
- Garfield: You know, those notches show how much you love me.
- Vic: Is that what you think of me?
- Garfield: Yep.
- Vic: Nah, I was just counting how many slices of lasagna you ate.
- [Last lines, cut to Garfield preparing food]
- Garfield: [voiceover] My medium is cuisine. My colors are flavors. My palette is my palette, if you will. [Soon, He's done making food. Though it doesn’t look appetizing] Dinner is served.
- [Odie uses a fire extinguisher to put out the flames in the oven]
- Vic: Wow, son! I didn’t know you could cook.
- Garfield: Ah, yes. [as he tries to pull out a piece] Pasta is my paint and the dinner plate is my canvas. [puts out a piece with a saltshaker in it] Oh, so that’s where that went. [He gives a piece to Vic, who tries it]
- Vic: I had worse. [laughs]
- [Garfield serves Odie and Jon a few more pieces]
- Jon Arbuckle: Thank you, Garfield. [notices Vic eating up] Uh, is he gonna be coming around for dinner often?
- Garfield: Yeah. He's family.
- [Odie barks, Jon and Garfield laughing. But suddenly, Jon receives a notification on his phone]
- Jon Arbuckle: What? Why do I have a take-out bill for 6,000 drone deliveries?!
- [Garfield shushes the audience. We cut to a montage of Vic and Garfield living together. Vic uses a Walmart app to purchase a big chair on wheels to join his son. Then, they eat out food from the fridge. Next, they eat their pizza the same way Garfield did in the opening before picking their teeth clean. At the restaurant, they, along with Odie, disguise themselves to order food. On the bed, Garfield lies on Jon’s face and Vic lies on top of him, breaking the bed down from his weight. Cut to them riding in Jon’s car while sticking their heads out the windows. Jinx is seen doing community service by cleaning up trash. She throws her grabber and helmet down in anger. At Garfield’s birthday party, everyone is invited. Otto, Ethel, Liz, Marla, Vito, Vic’s old cat gang, the token animals, Roland and Nolan...Even Nermal appears, asking for a slice of cake. Garfield glares at him. Finally, Jon puts up a big picture of him and his pets, including Vic]
- [After the credits, we fade to a three-panel comic strip in the style of Jim Davis]
- Garfield: Why are you still here? Oh! I know! You're waiting for the sequel!
Cast
[edit]
- Chris Pratt — Garfield
- Samuel L. Jackson — Vic
- Hannah Waddingham — Jinx
- Ving Rhames — Otto
- Nicholas Hoult — Jon Arbuckle
- Cecily Strong — Marge Malone
- Harvey Guillén — Odie
- Brett Goldstein — Roland
- Bowen Yang — Nolan
- Snoop Dogg — Maurice
- Janelle James — Olivia
- Angus Cloud — Snickers
- Jeff Foxworthy — Zapped Bird
- Eugenia Caruso — Maria
- Cameron Bernard Jones — Barry, Lactose Farms Phone Operator #1
- Alicia Grace Turrell — Ethel, Lactose Farms Phone Operator #2
- Dev Joshi — Liz Wilson
External Links
[edit]
Wikipedia has an article about:
- The Garfield Movie quotes at the Internet Movie Database
- The Garfield Movie at Rotten Tomatoes
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